The Problem With Australia’s Under-16 Social Media Ban
What Parents Can Do Instead!
Last Wednesday, Australia’s new under-16 social media ban came into effect, making it illegal for platforms such as Facebook, Instagram and TikTok to create or maintain accounts for children under the age of 16.
The intention is clear and well-meaning. Children are particularly vulnerable to psychological distress caused by inappropriate or harmful online content, and many parents welcome any measure designed to improve online safety for children.
But while the motivation behind the social media age restrictions in Australia is understandable, it raises an important question for families. Will a legal ban actually stop children from accessing social media, or does it simply push the behaviour underground?
Apps that are banned from December 10 2025 for under 16s
Why many parents feel relieved
For many parents, the ban offers something they have been craving: a clear boundary.
Being able to say “It’s against the law” can make conversations about screen time and social media use far simpler, and there is no doubt that less time on screens is generally a positive thing.
Some estimates suggest that today’s children will spend an average of 25 full years of their lives looking at a screen. That equates to around 219,000 hours. When we consider that we sleep for roughly a third of our lives, screen exposure could stretch closer to 35 years, almost half a lifetime. It is confronting and it understandably worries parents.
Still, screen time is only one part of a much bigger picture.
Bans do not replace parenting.
Regardless of any government ban, exposure to unsuitable social media content is just another risk that parents need to help their children navigate. Like sex, drugs, peer pressure and road safety, online risks are now part of growing up.
The goal of positive parenting is not to eliminate risk entirely, which is impossible, but to equip children with the skills and confidence to manage risk wisely. This is where an outright ban can fall short. By simply denying access, we may also deny children valuable learning experiences, social connections and opportunities to practise good judgement in a supported way.
“No” versus “Know” parenting
To understand this difference, it helps to look at the “No” and “Know” approaches to safety, a concept developed by Jessica Alexander, author of The Danish Way of Parenting.
The “No” approach focuses on preventing children from doing anything that could be remotely dangerous. While this may create short-term safety, it can undermine long-term competence and confidence. Children raised this way may take greater risks when unsupervised, often out of resentment or rebellion.
Over time, constant restriction can also strain the parent-child relationship, leaving children feeling untrusted and more likely to hide their behaviour.
The “Know” approach takes a different path. It invites conversation. Parents explore what their child wants to do, why they are drawn to it, what risks exist and how those risks can be managed safely. Life itself carries risk, even getting out of bed does. Teaching children how to think critically about risk is a cornerstone of positive parenting.
Talking about smartphone use
Smartphone and social media use are ideal starting points for this kind of discussion. When parents engage respectfully, children feel trusted and are more likely to listen, learn and act responsibly when they are on their own.
Rather than dismissing social media as “rubbish”, try asking what your child enjoys online and why. One young girl I know spent weeks exchanging photos of unusual walls with her best friend, awarding points for creativity. It made little sense to the adults around her, but it mattered to her.
From there, conversations can naturally move to where scrolling can lead and why certain sites, conversations and online behaviours should be avoided. Just as there are physical places and people children need to steer clear of, especially at night, the digital world also requires awareness and boundaries.
Building trust protects children online
Genuine trust and respect, built through open conversations, increase the likelihood that your child will come to you when something feels wrong. It also reduces the chance they will dive into unsafe online spaces simply because they feel misunderstood or controlled.
Every parenting interaction is an opportunity to leave your child feeling more confident, trusted and responsible. This remains true even when discussing mistakes or boundary-crossing. Over time, these interactions help children develop maturity as a strength of character.
Ultimately, the children most at risk from social media are not those who have access to it. They are the ones who do not feel loved, trusted or respected. No government ban can replace the protective power of a strong parent-child relationship.
Author:
Dr Terence Sheppard
Paediatric Psychologist, Adelaide
Author of Positive Parenting: A Guide to Raising Psychologically Healthy Children
